Thinking, Thinking, Thinking

Well we have no news on what we have decided yet. Garrett and I started talking about it last night, which made me feel a lot better. We are no closer to a decision. We have until Wednesday to decide, so I guess we have a few days yet. I think I would like to try the clomid with IUI (intrauterine insemination) but I just can't get past the "at least 50%" chance of another ectopic. That is really scary to me. I just don't know if I want to go through that again. Then again, I would kick myself if we went to IVF and could have gotten pregnant with the cheaper route. The $10,000 is a lot to swallow. I'll be doing research this weekend on loans and I'll call the RE on Monday to see if they have anywhere they recommend for loans. I think the more information we have about both decisions the better. It's just a really big and hard decision to make. Either one has really good qualities and really bad quailities that make it difficult. But, like Dad said, no one can make these decisions except Garrett and I. It would just be so much easier to have one option. That way I'm not kicking myself if I make the wrong one. There are no easy answers in life, right!?! I think one of the biggest obsticles that Garrett is having is that we have had lots of testing done, me more than him, and we still don't have any of the answers we want. We don't know why we are having so much trouble this time. No one knows or has any ideas. That is really hard for him to wrap his head around. He believes that if we are paying money and they are running all these tests it should be like any other doctor and have some sort of result at the end. I totally understand where he is comming from. We just have to move on from here. There really isn't anything we can do about it. We just take the information we've recieved and go from there. Hopefully, soon we'll come to our decision. I'm sure you are all anxious to hear what we decide.